Panic Moments

This last two weeks of the month- December is the remarkable time!

First, my second son who has been sent to treat in hospital after 1 week, I requested the doctor to leave. Of course, the doctor idea is preferable for me to continue to stay a few days more but I saw my son was already better even he wasn't 100% recover but he seemed okay. Thus, I did missing my room, my home. Staying at hospital, I really went through a lot of boring and unpleasant time. Then, my request became successful.

Backing home, I was extremely happy as dancing along with the beautiful music. Yeah, excited! However, 8.00 pm arrived that my second son illness re-started and it's badly than the previous one. Until 2.30 am in the morning, I cannot wait more and went back to hospital. Though, I still needed to wait until working hours of 7.00 am. My son body's became so soft and he seemed unconscious that even I tried to shake him, he still had no reaction. My tears started falling down none stop and no shamed even there were hundred people around me... Urgently meeting with doctor, after checkup, actually my son was just damn tired from sick and fell asleep. Oh God! In addition, coz of my stubborn attitude to against the doctor's advice for still insisted to leave hospital and finally was back so; I got much blame from all including my family, relatives, the ones who heard about this and especially the doctor and nurses there... Well, I accepted all coz it was really my improper decision.

At the same time, my hubby was sick too and so did me. Whatever, I still needed to come to work coz it has been 1 week already that I asked for permission. I'm sick but daytime I need to work and night time I need to take care my second baby. Last night, my health was much an issue that I cannot stay alone. My husband came to hospital at 10.00 pm to take care me and my second son; kept the first son with grandparents. Yeah, I have my Mom to help me by accompany my second son at hospital this week since I am already back to work . Unfortunately, she could help at hospital only 1.5 days and she became sick that must be back home and relax; so pity her. My husband went to the hospital to accompany my son somehow he isn't fully recover.

More than words, my healthy first son was strangely sick urgently. He remained vomiting and cannot eat anything even the liquid food. His heat was up and up too. Whatever, at first he still could play this and that which just around 4.00 pm, he stopped doing anything, vomited more and more and lay down with very pale face. My Mom was very shocked; she was crying so much coz of worry! Later, my son was sent to a Clinic and he got Food Poisoning (the doctor said). Poor him! Until this morning, he isn't much better yet. Oh life! My Mom is home for relaxing but coz situation was changed, she has no choice beside takes caring my first son instead of me and so do the rest of my family members; help each other to take care my little first son.

I just wonder.... what are more gonna happen to my family?????????????

Uhmm.... such the worse moments of the year!

Times spent in hospital...

Kontheak Bopha Hospital is where offers the free charge of fee to cure under 15 years old children. Well, I have been here twice already with my second son of just now is 6 months old. First time, we spent only 2 nights and left. However, now is 4 nights that flew and it's no exact confirm of how long we would be required to stay...due to unstable health condition of my baby. Every seconds staying here is flying very slow to me... Uhmmm, I feel hard to breathe and live here...just coz I feel disgusted to almost of things...including eating here, using this public bathroom and toilet, sleeping here, breathing here...virus! I feel there are virus everywhere; though, here is much clean and hygiene if compare to other public hospitals... You know, coz I then still need to be here, all I can do, is to ignore the negativity in my thought and keep living the way other live. They can, I can!!!

Staying here, I met a lot of women whom is called mothers to their child... They are:

- A grandma who is just 35 with her grand-daughter of 5 months and around 18 mommy! They are so funny...lol

- A mother who is only 27 years old but has 5 children, the oldest kid of around 8 years... She said no one help her to feed and take care her kids but only her and her kid's daddy! Oh ma! My both kids, I get the big help from my mom and I still don't wanna live sometime just coz it is so rough while having them...lol

- A young countryside  mom who is 16 years old or something... Nurse prepared document for her kid and asked what her husband name is and she replied, she didn't know his name nor who he was. She said she met him only once during Phcum Ben days... We all heard it and recognized speechlessly... =='

- Most of them, the parenthood are from provinces, occupation of the farmer, worker, housewife, bread seller, drinks seller, recycle collector, cleaner... They are mostly black and brown...(the people who were around my bed). Seeing them, I first felt discriminated; I know I'm not rich nor white...but I  just felt so...hehehe but you know, they are so so so helpful! I didn't even ask for their help but they came to help me themselves with honesty and generosity! Uhmmm, they are real naive...

- A 35 years old mom who has 6 children, 7 years old son the oldest. She told us she has only 15000 Riel for traveling from province to here to cure her a few months old baby. She is quite poor! During her kid's treatment time, she always begs for food from her surrounding people... Actually, her husband also has an acceptable job and can support her and kids living well; just the problem is that he doesn't care the family! He doesn't give her the money, he handles it himself. He is a professional drinker! Everyday that he is drunk! By the way, this mommy lost two of her kids. One was falling from the bed and die while she was farming. Another, she kept with her hubby to take care when she went to the field and that baby cried until dead coz his dad didn't take any attention. Die in front of his own dad and he acted as nothing happened; she said. So she current has only 4 kids and her two years old child is having brain illness and she has no ability to cure even it is free from this hospital coz she has no supported budget to travel and eat during time in hospital. She said Doctor once told her, this kid would be die soon if she won't take action... She still keeps do nothing...to me, I feel her this kid is living only for his dead...hmmmm. We asked her if it is so hard in living so, why she keep having baby? She said her husband won't listen to her, whenever he wants sex, she must....even after she deliver and she still is extremely weak... Oh lord, poor her and her kids! I suggest her to divorce (I'm so bitchy lol) and she just smiled... Worse loving-fate does exist! X(

In addition, even the doctors and nurses... Some looks nice but bad mouthing and care us lessly ...***sight**** meantime, some look so mean and even bad mouthing too but have very kind heart! Ohhohhh, that main Doctor is white, middle age, wear glasses, tall, handsome, knowledgeable, nice words and even humble! So charming! But he already got married lol... By the way, there is another tall handsome Doctor but a bit black and his face....Uhmmm.... Hehehe really deserved some punches! My first time here, he blamed me and asked how old I was?! Too young that don't know how to care baby properly... But this second time, he may forget me and asked...how many children I have.. I said two... He seemed surprised and said, just two???? After, he stopped saying any more....but...but...why!??? I looked so old? Or coz of my this super fat body is suitable for 7 children or what???? Yis!!!! 

------my Christmas time this year of 2015, hospital&blog------- jobbb sa'artt! XD  

No Money---- No Life!

I gonna proof of why is No Money, No Life....
Have you ever heard the quote "No Money; No Honey"?

Uhmm, Lets start from this quote... You know....
No money, no honey;
No honey, no marry;
No marry, no baby;
No baby, life's empty;
Life's empty, unreasonable worry;
Unreasonable worry, become frenzy;
Become frenzy, commit suicide;
Commit suicide, DIE.

Then, make sure you have money or you will be ended DIE.
Agree???
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^^ I'm just joking around; somehow, find out the answer by yourself! =))

ទីបំផុត (ហេង​ ពិទូរ) Ti Bom Pot by Heng Pitou

Ti Bom Pot by Heng Pitou

This is the newest song that is very popular by most of Cambodian people; especially the teenagers and early adults. Well, it is popular coz it is the original song that was written by this singer directly without any copy from anyone.

To me, I just was so awkward during watching this video; plus its lyric as well. I'm shocked...lol... Just because the main actress seems copy all my saying words that always exist when I'm in war with my man. Thus, even the way the performed.... Oh God!!! It's quite the same!

Questions:

1. Did they investigate secretly about my family? So that they could copy almost of my words ...

2. Then, my family argument is that popular to make them interested?

3. This video make sense, doesn't it?

Last question...

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4. Would I and my man also end up as this video????

------is loading the answers------

Christmas 2015 is coming!

Ohohohoh…..
Christmas is coming…

Most of people are chilly and wishing,

For happiness or be blessing,

For the New Year 2016 that is upcoming.

Oh, Santa! Are you real or just like a dream?

Would you bring us the wishes we are whispering?

Or would you send the gifts per what we think?

Yeaaaa…. I’m always wondering,

If this would be happening.

Grandpa Santa please,

If you don’t gain me the wishes,

Or give me the gifts,

Maybe, I won’t have bliss,

For this history day of the birth of Christ.

Ahhh…Santa; don’t tell me, you think of my hubby;

Expect him to give me the memory,

Of getting gift or special time for his lady,

It is not that easily,

Hahahaa…. He may afraid it gonna drive me silly… XD

By the way, lets me sing my Christmas song of each every year…

“We wish you a Merry Christmas

We wish you a Merry Christmas

We wish you a Merry Christmas

And a Happy New Year!!!

Jingle bells jingle bells

jingle all the way!

Oh what fun

it is to ride

In a one horse open sleigh, Hey!”

Lol… be honest, I always think this is only one song but actually it is from two different songs… “We Wish You a Merry Christmas” and “Jingle Bells”

Be kiddy every year, oh pity ME! =))

WOMAN ME

Woman, hearing “woman” word…what do you think of the definition?

Woman, has a lot of definitions to me since it isn’t that easily to set the default one… lol

Even my own self, sometime I’m just doubtful if what I do want the most… hehehe…

When I and my man are around each other...

We are often fighting… teasing each other in term of mental violent...

He even rarely shows his love toward me… I’m a bit lonely and he seems doesn’t tend to know…

I feel I always meet metal offense…lol

I wish we would separate sometime to gain peace…

All I want is Love or at least Peace!

When we are in reality of being away from each other….

First day, I feel…”wow! It’s so peaceful!” ^^

Several next days, uhhhh…. But I don’t really like somewhere is that silent so…. ?_?

Especially; no him, everything I need to do only by myself,

Take care the both kids, washing milk bottle, clothes, bathing them, feed them,  give them medicine…etc, nahhh…. I’m so exhausted! I already spend my almost 10 hours at work and need to back home early to do these and those none stop; thus, full night keep an eye on them if they need milk? Going to toilet? Oh no!!! They have nightmare? Cuddle and whisper any songs until they are asleep so I can too….

I feel envy…why am I so tired and he can enjoy abroad time freely?

He should come early! Why the days seem moving very slow so?!

I feel I meet indirectly physical offense… XP

All I want now is Time to relax!

The day he comes back is coming…

I’m like…huhhhh??? What??? He will be back soon?

I didn’t really notice after day by day I’m working as an animal…

I feel I already could get used to…

Why he come back so early? (Actually he just come back per exact schedule)

I hate him!

All I want at this state is slower the day moving!!!

Finally, he comes back! On the arrival day, I’m just like….

Whatttttt???? so fast so fast the day is moving…

Can’t it then be a bit slower with the time moving?

I don’t feel good to meet him…

Feeling as his face’s deserved some punches…

I though, still then stand there at the Arrival Place for him, >__<’

My bigger son is so excited to wait for his daddy’s presence…

He keeps standing among crowed people with his grandpa for his daddy,

Where is me? Lol… I’m there on the bench, sitting only with my 5 months old kid and enjoy night view…lol

All I want here is the Sleep, I’m so sleepy at this hour of almost mid night!

Back home be like….

He said…ehhh honey, see what I bring for you!

Me: I’m so sleepy… Let’s see it tomorrow…

Him: Here! Nice?

Me: I’m really sleepy nah… (but I already sit next to him! ***ashamed*** ^^’)

Why girls always want gift??!! :D

Him: love?

Me: why? Why? So many!!!! You’re such wasting uselessly!

“But I did smile for those gifts =))”

Him: yersss…sure, I spent all the money without any belonging to me! =_=’

However, all I want now isn’t only the gifts but MONEY! Hehehe

In short, what do I want exactly? Who is really me?

+++Out of Ideas+++

+++Endless Desires+++

Tell me please! Why can’t I get completed set?

I live here in this human world for almost 26 years now…. Base on my experience in this world, I do doubt of why I’m always required to select the choices for my life? I never can get the full set one…

Oh Lord, I want to complain! Why do you treat me so??? hmmm…lol

I was asked to select only a choice among:

*PARENTS

1. Fussy, sometime also seem annoying (^,<), nahhh…actually love never ever lose for their children…

2. Nicely, generously, rich but no any time for their children…No time to be fussy nor argue....

>>>Hehehe… I don’t like silent world without love, I always want 1^st choice!

*SIBLINGS

1. Respect each sibling; know what is right & what is wrong… mature but seems a bit far distant to each one!

2. Fighting with each other both words or even sometime hands and legs XD; always want to be the right side….childish! Need time to be growing together…

>>>Repeatedly, I love noisy world… if I select one, nothing is excited! lol

*BEAUTY
1. Elegant Body + normal voice + ugly face

2. Fatty Body + sweet voice + cute face

>>>So I chose 2^nd choice! =_=

*EDUCATION

1. Always get good grade, studying hard, popular outstanding students

2. Have intelligence from birth but never study hard nor getting good grade and popular by extremely talkative in class

>>>Nahhh….this one you didn’t ask me to choose but offer me the 2^nd choice! Herssssss!

*FRIENDSHIP

1. Long Term, never forget each other but not that very sweet (arguments often exist)

2. Beautiful words, seems very closed, no arguments but short term

>>>I chose the 1^st…

*WORK

1. Good work, good boss, good teamwork but low salary

2. High salary, good work but ordinary boss + ordinary or can be negative teamwork

>>>I didn’t even consider much but quickly put money as priority! Selected 2^nd! ^^

*SNEHA (LOVE)

1. Chocolate love wordings man, show the world of his love, good education & attitude but so-so appearance and don’t really think of married!

2. Say no to sweet love wording, seems shy, can be said arrogant Prince’s attitude, education is okay but good appearance and show love by asking for married

>>>Hehehe, I choose married! I always thought it is the most safe and stable love world….

*MY CHILDREN

1. Talkative, smart but not cute

2. Cute, smart but not talkative…

>>>I want cute smart children and love speaking a lot too… but this choice doesn’t exist… So, chose 2^nd! Let’s be cute together my kids! gagaga

* PARENTS-IN-LAW

1. Fair living condition level but daughter in law to them is almost alike their birth-daughter…

2. Very rich but consider daughter in law just still alike none-relatives

>>>Can’t I meet very rich parents in law who deeply love me? Hmmm…. I’m not really allowed to mix these two choices together… Then, I selected 1^st choice… Love!

To all above choices, I should be allowed to select only the good points… I trust that, the Lord, you obviously know what my real favorites are. Though, you still mix my favorites with the negative points… You! You have intention to put me going through barriers of life, right?

I’m tired now; tired of all the points that I chose which include the negative parts… Especially, I’m quite tired with my man for none love showing to me and the world as well….

Oun hort…