I got Promoted... ~___________~

People would be really excited and proudly to be promoted; though, it seems strange to me... I feel so nervous and mix up. Of course, such an untidy feeling I meet... I feel surprised and unexpected... I don’t really feel ready to get this opportunity... Such a stress mood... It takes a night to think of obvious problems that cause me to be so... Then I see... I get promoted without any pre-inform to me...Though, it is not so strange but there is something quite stranger than this... There is no any discussion to all my team as well... They look so awkward to hear this hot information...some looks fine to hear while some looks so unsatisfied to know it... They may think it is communist...without any discussion from team...Nahhh, Communist never exists in my favorite list...I love freedom... I love democracy... Everyone wanna do something bigger... So do I...but in a proper way than this surprised promotion... I still need team to support me... Once they feel so, will they be able to accept me from their heart and soul? Okay...maybe they won’t accept me... Even so, I will still try my best to accomplish all my responsibility and make it done well... I will be so exhausted...that’s okay... However, the most hatred point to me is that... I so hate to work in such a non team sprit... a team that is dominated...a team with criticism... How long would I be able to stay in this kinda circumstance?? Get promoted but it look like even worse... :[

So far and so forth, I can’t even understand myself immediately... that’s why time is always the best medicine...the best way to release problems...

Such so complicated FEELING

What is going on of my inner feeling now? I feel so complicated... I’m not sure what I exactly want... My inner world used to be so peaceful without any envy; though, right now I feel so messy... That seems there are two human being in my this single body...one is so starving to get that stuff while another say she doesn’t care of what happens...no matter who takes that stuff, it’s not her business since it doesn’t mean only to be her possession since first step... Still, the first say that at first moment, she deserves to get it and even allow to get it but just a glance, that stuff is taken and give to the new person... and that new person is someone she won’t willing to fight for getting back that stuff..coz it is the best stuff that person should catch...especially, that person is someone she likes...she can’t sacrificed to achieve for herself but better for that person... Actually it is also her choice...to give up and encourage that person to get...but one of her feeling still feel a bit of regret... Gold chance arrives... why she’s brave to lets it go? How come it happens?

Whatever, she absolutely understands one real feeling of herself...if that is not that person; she will never give up and would jump into that battle to get that stuff! NO DOUBT NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS; SHE WILL OVERCOME COZ SHE BELIEVES SHE WILL WIN FOR SURE!

The one who’s so ambitious to get it is me...and the one who agree to lets it be in another’s hand, is also me...I’m in this condition is just alike Alice and that stuff is alike White Rabbit which will guide me the way to enter Wonderland... now that White Rabbit is lost... I won’t be able to reach my goal unless I find another White Rabbit...Oh my...!!!

Green Raincoat ^_________^

Remember of that day while it was cats and dogs raining as today, it was almost my leaving time from work. I had to leave even there's no raincoat and it’s heavy rain since if I wait, I will stuck in that traffic jam with floody street and my motorbike may also stop working coz of that plenty water...Then, my honey called to ask me if I didn't have raincoat so he would bought for me... Yeah!!! I said YES...but I also said...at least he could bring me the green one or I won’t take it...hahahaha... He yelled at me... "Yisss, do you still think of your favorite color in this kinda condition?" hehehe... ma intention got success... I knew he wouldn't be able to calm down from my overboard words since that is his nature...his real type... Just meant to put him in fire..gagaga...

Around 20 mins passed...he called me to take the raincoat...awww....he brought me the Green one...while he’s wet of his full body...and I asked him why...he said...coz he tried to travel around to find the green one first but until he found it...he’s totally wet...there’s no use to buy for himself.... I was so excited...hehehe...he took my words seriously and tried to make it happened though he thought it’s too much...lol...

At the same time, I wonder...how silly he was...why didn't he buy the raincoat and wore it first before went around to find for me? Such a silly lovely honey to me! :*

P.S. He looked so sexy with his wet white shirt, some rain-drop on his face n that wet messy hair; plus with his seem strict face while handed that raincoat to me... Love that landscape at that moment. Such a stunned handsome guy and sweet as well! lol... :* :* :*

Cutie Gift from Cutie Gal :D

My friend, closed one, lovely one and sweetie one just came back from vacation in Vietnam and she doesn't forget in choosing such a cutie gift for me as a clock...so fit with my working desk...feeling so fresh and that's my taste my interest! yayyyy!!!! ^^

Here it is...

The Same Person but Different...

Once you meet a guy whom is quite unique to you...from his so sweet caring...he always asks if you are fine...worry of you...even find out whenever you are unhappy...be with you all the time, make you smile, make you laugh and show as you are his girl in front of all people and even the only one... act as proudly to have you... pretty happy to be with you... no matter where he is, he still call to visit you...say he misses you...love you and even say that wanna marry you...You seem have no negative parts to him...This is a kind of Boyfriend that exists in this world... You just can’t say directly but actually you already agree to give the rest of your life be a long with him...really love him, excited and fall into romance and pinky world once there is him...Image and memory of your marvelous day together remain in both pure hearts... Finally, you both got married... 

HOWEVER, after married, life have been changed...that boyfriend whom is now your husband become so rough from time to time...become rude and arrogant, selfish and criticizes you, your appearance from toe to head... don’t really focus on your emotion...lets and push problems falling on you....keep challenging when anything happen for his defending to be the one whom is right... and cause you are not that easy to be fought... you keep challenging him back..such a revenge...you keep remembering all his mistakes..and he acts the same...problems re-happen..you both take those mistakes as reference to get challenging again...the scene of cool war real happen...lastly a party must get right...but what’s then? The right one still don’t look like happy to be a winner... and the loser still store anger in heart...even there have been found for who is right and who is wrong...but nothing get better...both sides keep silent to each other...from second to second...minutes to minutes...hours to hours and days to days...they still become speechless to each one... what’s then??

Sometime, you, a couple, really don’t know what is the proper way to act... if there is mistake and you won’t say it out...it will even gain...in contrast, if you say it out...there will be a debate war or if one keeps silent and lets another win...that person will keep remembering and ache in heart and soul..once it becomes more and more, it will explode one day..and argument will be even bigger...or if you may want to forget all of mistakes...forgive and forget...but are you sure you really can do it? You both afterward just really keep silent and be a part.... You both absolutely know that causing argument is nothing but damaging the relation of yours...You know it...and still lets it happen...WHY???