It was December last year, it happened from that point…
My hubby’s friends called him to join Count Down party at Siem Reap and we agreed. It was a fun trip of 6 families including mine and more than 10 children, 95% was boys! lol
We had a happy breakfast, coffee and lunch…
The Moms and
children went visiting Angkor Wat excitedly with our tour guide’s history telling…
Yes, my first time for being there with a tour guide! ^^ And the Dads waited us
at the hotel…
After
leaving the Angkor Wat tours, we went to the biggest Ferris Wheel in the city…
We had a chilled
dinner, plenty of foods, the dinning space was next to the pool where the kids enjoyed
to the max in the pool, got up and got foods… Yeah, there were wine, beers,
coke and tea… You knew, I’m a tea’s fan! :D
Some people went
to the night market at around 10pm while I and my boys went to our room, hehehe…
I was tired…
Next day, the
kids got up early, cycling around the hotel and pool time again…. Next, we
arrived Kulen mountain, walking across the forest coz the road was so crowded…
had a nice meal there with natural landscapes…
I did enjoy
that trip until I knew they would pay for my family’s cost… I questioned HOW
COME?
Then, I knew little by little… My family was the poorest among them…
97% of Them,
wanted us to join, knowing our status… They treated us very friendly with their
huge generosity…
I don’t need
to mention that 3% of them right? Hehehe… Yet, I’m pleased to share! 3% of
them, treated me differently, made me feel so small, I sensed the indirectly
bully…
Well, I will
focus on the bright side, the high percentage part…
They are the
powerful and high-ranking officer, the managing director, the CEO, the wealthy
businessman and they welcomed my family from when they made friends with my
hubby…
I do feel grateful for their kind regardless of social rank or family’s status…
THOUGH, I don’t
think I fit in this group…
And I will
never draw illusion of my family’s image to fit them,
I will
remain who I and my family are,
Never fake
my identity or try to look rich even if later I may become rich… XD
And being
fair is my moral, especially group trip…
Being where
we feel common with, is my preferable…
I alerted my
hubby, this must be the first and the last time we would be with them as family trip…
I don’t mind him being friends with them, have café or such meal with them but
just please don’t bring me and the kids with… I don’t feel belonging, I don’t
feel right and I don’t feel real…
Whatever, thing really don’t go as I preferred…
Next event
happened that I still needed to join with my hubby. I rejected, yet I still
ended up being with them…
From one to
another one, my presence was there in the group…
The unease
feeling is still here in my heart…
But I do
agree, I cherish those moments a lot…
New experiences
I gain with no large expense… Being with another level of people I never deal
with in the past, they know my family’s condition clearly and still accepted us
into their crew… Their connection is such the big one, including his excellency
people…
Honestly, I feel very weird, some of my heart is excited but most of my heart still cannot accept it… I feel unsafe, I cannot judge this new group yet whether they are sincere to my family or what is the reason behind?
Maybe, I’m seeing
things…something is coming, something that is not a gift…
Or maybe I’m
over thinking…
If they are
sincere to this friendship, WHY? Tell me WHY?
Last but not
least, I already stepped into this new world…
What if that
Count Down Trip represented the rabbit hole and I with my family’s path will be
“Alice in Wonderland”?
