He told me so…

#I din mean he's dat handsome lol bt juz v were in dis position#

Last night, I was viewing up and down on Facebook newsfeed; my eyes focused on this small device with full attention and noticed nothing. I didn’t know when exactly that he came closely to me and took my phone away out of hand. Simultaneously, he pulled me next me his body and cuddled me… I felt awkward since we just got argument a day before last night…

He kissed my forehead and said something lightly which I could hear loudly…

“I love you… why do you hate me?”

I asked again… “Are you sure you love me?” [[[I just wanna hear one more time! Lol]]]

“Of course, I do love you!”

“So why do you dare to make me angry?”

“Just coz I was angry too”

“Love me, how come could you angry me?”

“Don’t you know? You are so good at teasing me…”

“Huh, did I?”

I tended to say more but was bothered by his mouth to cover mine for not allowed me to speak more….

O_O’ -----blushing----- ^^

After a while, he was still there next to me, hugged me tightly and told me…

“I feel so at ease, comfortable and full of joy whenever we are cuddling so until falling asleep together…”

My head is thinking….”Could you also feel this way, Mr. arrogant? Or you just learned this drama sentence from anywhere?” =)) :’> ^,^

I just feel nothing beside…”awww…. I love this type of man, a man who is in front of me now, this moment’s man! Why don’t you keep this drama style all the time? XD”

We developed our feeling to be more and more… Don’t you think so? We are about to do something excited together… XD

BUT….

Our little son got up and was crying!!!!!!!!!

+______+’

                                                                                                                                                     

Okay…. Our drama mostly ends like that….

I pushed him aside and turned to cuddle my baby; spent not less time in order to put him back to sleep….

What did my man do then?

He walked to his working desk and worked….

^_______<’

Then and Now photos

hehehehe.... They are so funny! I love their pictures a lot... They all made my day! XD
Here, lets me share you...

Me: Being A Mom...

hehehehe... I found these animations do describe about the life of my current chapter (after married)...

Just like while you are single, "when will you marry?"
*tired*

Yesss!!! He didn't answer mine too! @.@

You know, I always feel regret after changing... such a waste! Less than 5 mins to change again! lol

Such a tough decision! XD

Uhmmm, I honestly don't do cooking but beside, YES! ^^

A feeling that often comes to visit me!

hehehe, coz my Mom is my information server!

I used to sing his favorite song of "The wheels on the bus go round and round" =))

My super excitement feeling during all weekend! Aiiiii XD

He used to wonder about this while I also wondered about him...
"So how come don't you know?" haha

Right, a feeling I usually feel...before is 2 children but now is 3! =,=' 

Huh, damn sure! At least I spend 5 mins to convince him for bathing...
End up by spending 3 mins more to convince him not to cry by leaving bathroom! ~_____~

I'm now in step two... He is 3.5 years now... When will he speak?
I'm seriously worried!

A neat person I was until now, It's okayyy...until there is some space to walk... haha

Ouchhhh, it is, it is! Damn mad at those stuff! lol

And my friends always disappointed or angry me...lol...

hahahha... that blonde lady's facial expression is my single friends' expression! ^^

HOW'S ABOUT YOU? :D

Mom! You scared me!!!

Yesterday, I and Mom got argument… Uhmm, it’s not a big one actually; however, my Mom took it seriously and I cannot accept the way she treated me while the argument became bigger and bigger…

In short, within the argument, no one is exactly right or exactly wrong. The both parties are wrong; although, I’m less wrong comparing to her. I meant it! Of course, mostly I control my anger well with her since she is my mom, my only mom! Just yesterday, I got some problems during work and I felt not good at all. I cannot stand still with only this small argument and decided to fight her back with a very strong debate. Finally, I won!

Undeserved thing happened…

I was wearing old and unfashionable clothes; lift my hair all up that could show my big circle face clearly and removed all makeup. This is my home style and I was just prettily ugly… During the argument with Mom, I was crying until I got swollen eyelids and so did her… Our tears dropped coz we were mad at each other… Like Mom like daughter! Mom was even angrier since she lost me…

I tried to end this scene and ran to my room upstair on the first floor… Phone rang… My sister called me… and I knew… My Mom left the phone and walked out from home!!!!

I ran quickly from home to stop her way out; though, she disappeared… Dad told me he ordered my little brother to stop her and they both disappeared! I was kinda scared for even riding motor during this hour of around 9.00 PM because there, in my village is silent, we are far from the crowded place. Nevertheless, my scare of being silent disappeared and replaced by the scared and worried about Mom and brother. My brain seemed pause; I had no idea but kept walking in the village alone to find her. Around 15mins once that there was one motorbike rode on the road last night. My brain really didn’t work, why didn’t I just take the motor out and seek for her? Shit!!!

I continued walking alone until some road, there was dark and frightening because of no street light. It seemed very misery under the moon’s soft blurry bright. The cold wind was blowing to touch my skin, I felt so goosebumps. Walking then through a few men of Tuk Tuk drivers, they were staring at me but they didn’t ask me at all if I needed their Tuk Tuk… Well, I knew the reason. I looked like a home-losing person or something like a beggar, a psycho person. Why? Because of my none stop crying face and that messy old clothes with a pair of very old shoes which were bigger than my feet, my Dad’s belonging! And he stopped using it so long time! Yea, I confused to take these shoes… :’{

Around half hour later, I backed home without found her. I asked Dad if she’s back home. What I got was a big blame from Dad for causing this happen… Well, so it meant she wasn’t home yet. I continued walking to find her again and Dad blamed me more with the command to stop me and stay home. No doubt, I won’t listen at all. Around 5 minutes walking from home, Dad reached me with his motor to find Mom and obviously, he didn’t forget to blame me one more time while told me to wait at home. I wonder if I was wrong, wasn't I? Noooo....

I was there out of home sitting alone and waiting for the result. I was that free of charged food for those uncountable mosquitoes… I asked myself of what if Dad couldn’t find Mom? What if she met any bad people? Hmmm…. I would never ever forgive myself! 15mins later, Dad backed home with the hearing voice of my Mom. I was hugely happy!!!! I ran to her immediately but why???? My welcome words with her were…”Why Mom? Why did you do that? What did you want from me? Did you teach me huh? If I met argument or something unhappy, I should run out of home? Did you teach me this? If I ran out of home because I was unhappy, did you know Mom? I would already reach an extremely far place from here!!!!!” She didn’t speak to me… I stopped speaking to her…

Nothing’s better between us now…

END.

January Morning~2016

The rooster starts alerting as it’s the New Day since the early dawn; the sun starts rising; the birds start singing and it awakes me from the sweetie sleeping…

The new day starts every day and morning mostly brings the people of new feeling, fresh and stressless. Though, I don’t really feel those kinda good feeling. I sleep with much consideration about my currently life and waking up thinking again about life. The night is when I begin to think and morning is when I remind of what I have been thinking. The most popular questions I remain asking myself are:

1. My debt of 72 months or 6 years that ties me and it was just 2 months over that I returned the debt… 70 months more to go; would I bear it?

2. Why I cannot lift that debt aside to feel better and return them step by step?

3. What if I cannot return the debt next few years?

4. Why do I need to respond with the high expense of daily life and now add up with that huge debt?

The debt of not only that 72 months but around 30K debt more from another resource… =((

5. Tell me please, so from now on I cannot have any holiday trips? Coz every single penny is calculated very detailed to support daily life…

6. How long more do I need to live this life?

7. What if I wanna try doing business which depends on fortune? Kinda gambling? Good?

8. So what if I wanna try to earn money by some illegal methods? ==?

9. Miracle does happen, doesn’t it? Then, I wish to see it happen on me this time… Would you please rescue me from this debt, Mr. Mirac**?

10. The last but not least, was I drunk to choose this walking road? !@_@!

Well, I won’t respond alone. My hubby also supports 1 part while I am 2 parts. Without him, I would be even tougher. Whatever, he is very easygoing that he won’t feel hard even a little bit… He knows we are in the poor condition but he doesn’t care much… Long life he is…

Of course, this is what I everyday deal with of this year 2016, January.

That's Why I'm Crying! ---joke---

There was a couple sleeping. The wife had a bad dream; she woke up scared and cried.

Her husband comforted her and asked why she cried, she replied: “I had a dream that a very rich and handsome man kidnapped me from you.”

Husband: “It is ok honey, it was just a dream.”

Wife responded loudly: “That is why I’m crying.”



Reference: Ayman July 24, 2012 at 10:59 pm

Woman Daily Needs ~ Brand Brand?

Only talking about woman being, what are so important to her?

They are:

- Clothes

- Shoes

- Bag

- Makeup stuff etc.

We need them in the beautiful last updated items. We gonna spend our money to buy those stuffs…

+Let’s ask, would you mind using secondhand materials?

NO WAY!!! Or we gonna be criticized if we are in high or medium level in society… Some said, using secondhand things will downgrade your level. There is discrimination about that, believe me. Meantime, some said using secondhand is unhygienic and low updated style.

+ Let’s ask, who doesn’t like popular Branding stuffs?

Every woman doesn’t like but does love lol… They are saving every penny to get those branding or expensive items. There is an idea said… “Don’t try to look rich by having a few dollar in an expensive bag; let’s have hundreds dollar in a cheap bag is far better!” What’s then? Woman still dare to have a few dollar in the expensive bag…lol…for a wealthy image…

Until you reach a point that force you to leave the life of having branding or expensive items. You have no choice but must leave it. Especially, when you are in a huge loan… Okayyyyy, stop being indirect… I have been changed a few years lately… I have no choices… Really no any choices beside using most of secondhand stuffs in order to save… I always try to hide this reality from other. I’m only transparent to some exceptional people, my best friends and my family. I’m damn shy…

* My honey used to blame me… “Why do you only use secondhand stuff?” ----- I’m speechless.

* He used to tell his family…”She is so stingy, try to spend very less for every single stuff…” ----- I’m speechless too.

* I remember that day, my mom-in-law praised my shirt…”ohhh, so beautiful shirt, my daughter! Where did you buy it? And how much was it?”

I only respond…”I forgot mom, long time I guess that I bought it!”

My honey just a little bit stared at me….

* Later, my mom in law praised my clothes again… and planned to buy one as me too… I didn’t even answer yet but he, my honey answered for me…

“Nahhh, Mom… It’s only secondhand… She used only secondhand….” =((

I’m so speechless, my eyes become hot… my heart is crying…

Is he feeling ashamed as I’m this kind?

Does he think I’m glad to be so?

He really doesn’t understand why I become like this at all?

Why is he trying to mock me about secondhand stuff?

I tell myself I cannot be speechless anymore…

I set up to boom a big argument with him…

I show him all my hidden feeling…

I tell him the reasons…

The result of our argument is… we stop speaking to each other… mad at each other… nothing improves!

~~~~~~~~~END~~~~~~~~~~

Hatred Level hits the Maximum, maybe!?

Be short… I feel my inner me is a demon now…

It’s simply to hate outsiders who hurt us either mental or physical… Though, I lately even hate people who are much closed to me… There is argument within my relatives VS my parents and of course, my relatives are just doing things overboard which make me very sick to see, to hear and my hatred is rising toward them. You know, actually it is not the first argument between relatives…I used to be so calm, positive and thinking as no matter what, they are my relatives… Push the argument aside and still be friendly to them; though, now I've changed… I don’t wanna talk to them… I feel uneasy seeing or even hearing their voice… Someday, I even hate my siblings… or even my honey… lol… So, how do you think of my feeling towards no-relative people who used to cause a paining scar on me, my memory? Hahaha, I do hate them as hell… I keep whispering to Mr. Karma to return them all they should be deserved for what they have done… Frankly, I curse them disgustingly in my stomach… XD

I begin hating my relatives,

I hate someday my siblings,

I hate all the bad people even they don’t really attack me,

I hate my honey,

And I crazily hate myself for many reasons too…

There is nothing clear of how come I could go this far…

Maybe meditation should be applied to cool the fire in my body…

Hopefully my hatred will rest in peace so soon….

Buddha blesses me!

For whoever is in the Snake Year!

Dear All Snake Year,

Here is your Chinesefortune of this 2016 Red Monkey year!
Enjoy! You have another good year! =)

Reference: http://www.chinesefortunecalendar.com/2016/2016snake.htm