Tuesday, July 30, 2019

Would that happen in 2020?

They shared me of their opinions, they told me they didn’t mean they wanted to hold me back since I could choose what I most preferred, that would be my right, my choice. Though, they may not notice the way they spoke… The way they told me, they all meant I should not go to that new place… They didn’t wanna lets me go… Something was so!
Finally, I put myself back at the current place…
They would totally believe I also thought as them that made me choose this way…

Frankly, my thought wasn’t changed… I still wanted that place! I felt this type of circumstance already happened once in the past whereas I wanted something so badly but I chose to give to that girl because I trusted her words and she ended up betraying me perfectly… I was damn sick of myself… I hated myself… I blamed myself for being generous to that wild animal like her… I blamed myself for trusting other from my all… Nevertheless, later on I’ve been back to believe “Kindness is nothing but the special gift ever”. So, I didn’t change my thought of that new place but I wanna try trusting people again and I chose to believe their kindness is pure…
They told me many good advantages but they said they didn’t promise to give me…They only meant I may get it… Then, they told me about those advantages again… They said they didn’t promise but it was totally a promise! Well, let’s see what would happen in 2020 since they said it would happen next half year or something…

I chose to trust them and if they break it, I don’t think I would suffer that much since I ever experienced that feeling already…
I chose to invest a bit several months and let’s see how would the destiny treats me…
I wanna challenge myself… At a glance, maybe I look like I wanna play game with pains but I think I won’t lose any much… No pains, no gains!

And opportunity would come to me again in another miracle way…





Tuesday, July 9, 2019

Roses are red, violets are...




Roses are red, violets are blue…
New opportunity comes, I wanna jump to…
Yes I wanna move, Yes I wanna move!

After a minute then, my heart gets a bit shocked…
Thinking of if I can really give a shot,
I gonna miss my current spot…

Emotional war takes place,
Coz I trust if I decide to challenge, I gonna gain YES,
What is matter; is my inner to choose what is best…

I’m alike in a status of triangle love,
I’m falling for that new guy,
And I still have empathy for my current man…

He doesn’t treat me wrong,
He treasures me good enough as lyric of a love song,
How can I choose to be gone?

I sometime wish him to be rough,
So I must be able to find this a reason to go,
Though, he is a very understanding and a generous man!

He stands in middle, he knows it, he knows my intention,
And what he shares, what he comments…
If I wanna go, he is open for the discussion!

He adds, “It doesn’t mean I want you to leave me”,
“But I am open to discuss” as he could guess I may interest,
Uhmmm, I confess his guess is accurately right all...

Roses are red, violets are purple,
He also indirectly says if his people are willing to stay,
This team would grow stronger and more powerful!

Roses are red, violets are blue,
Oh My Buddha, what should I do?
I hesitate, I don’t get what is my true desire...I’m in a blur, blurry world!

Wednesday, July 3, 2019

Stay Tune...

I tell myself to stay tune, my this year misfortunes don’t even reach that half yet… The bad things are on track… I had met, I met… Sadly to those misfortunes, though you guys are trying to attack me, I still believe the better day would unexpectedly arrive in miracle way…

You stay giving me pains, you stay giving me the tastes of the dark world and you might enjoy the way you could play with my life…
And you know what? That is just your illusion…
Even I am suffering, I don’t think I should stop smiling…
I still enjoy my life in every circumstances…
Including that dark moments…
I will never lose faith…
The tears I shed, the wounds I get, they are healed that quickly…
See? The moments I gain scars; are the moments I gain lessons…
I could even live better…
I do grow stronger…

You, Misfortunes! You harm me and I become A BETTER ME!




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I’ve been through a path I chose myself, my professional journey. I believed I would deliver the best result and met my stakeholder’s expect...