A Letter to My Beloved Girl

My Dearly Girl,

Are you getting better yet?

Thank you for sharing me your sadness. We are meant to not only sharing the fun but also your tough time. I would love to hear and I hope you would also feel releasing from your stress…

I got it of how you feel when all your circles are getting higher and higher while you are nothing much.

You must feel so pity to your own life, mustn’t you?

You would feel the life is just so unfair to you, right?

You may also cry and ask WHY?

Well, my dear… You know, there must be many people who only wish for a life like yours! That isn’t wrong to look up but please interpret it in positive way. You should look up of how people could be that high and you might start thinking of how you could adjust your life if you think it is not right yet. Please don’t look up and compare yourselves to them, blame yourselves and feel so sorry for yourselves! Different people, different fates we are. Don’t be mad and don’t expect because you and your friends started the same level, you would keep being at the same level! We didn’t walk the same way and we cannot imagine of how struggle they have been through as well. Even our own siblings from the same parents, we still grow up and get different lives…

My dear girl, why don’t you try to accept yourselves first? Please accept yourselves, accept your flaws and stop complaining nor comparing! Once you use your time to only comparing, you would miss those time to use in a fruitful way. Use your time to understand yourselves, analyze the ways you ever walked through and where you can fix instead. That is very common for human to do things incorrectly; yet, just don’t continue to do it. A person without mistakes will be a person without anything new… Don’t beat yourselves so much! That is self-violent! Love yourselves, warm yourselves, understand yourselves more and encourage yourselves, motivate yourselves to go on. A small step also makes a progress. Life is short! Make it count!

Uhmmm, I accept that you are still in a lower level of society but I won’t accept that you must live very unhappily. Your life is totally from your choice whether you choose to love it unconditionally, hug it tightly or to resent it and hate it… Remember! Your happiness is from within first!

Even without wealth, many people could still live in highly appreciation of harmony. Oh…oh, don’t confuse again! I didn’t mean you would live your whole life without any wealth! Hahhaha… You are still very young! You have plenty time to think of how you could strengthen your life’s standard!!!

“Think out of the box” is my favorite quote these last several months. Try applying it to yourselves! You would only get the same result from going on the same ways, don’t you think so? Hehehe

Actually, we can choose to talk but I prefer to write you this letter so you can read later… ^^

Don’t feel down again, okay?

I know you can do it!

A lot of loves!

DO WHAT SCARES ME

I’ve met many unfortunate situations and I don’t think it comes to its end yet. However, I turned most of those heart-aching occurring into life lessons and I became stronger. I’m not the strongest woman, yet I’m better than my previous me and I do appreciate myself for choosing this way to move on.

Recently, I tried something new which I had been so scared of… It should be something very ordinary to many people while it was tough to me and I used my all courage to do it…

I’ve never ever once stayed alone at home from my this almost 30 years old, I’m afraid of those atmosphere which is no human around… Imagination could kill a person… lol… Especially, the one who is so scared of the ghost just like me… Thus, I neither travel to any far place alone… What if I get lost? Or what if I get abducted? I’m not the child from the millionaire’s family, yet I still could think this way… hehehe…

Last weekend, it was a golden chance to test myself… All my family members had to go to join a celebration in the province several days and I previously would always follow them around. Though, this time I told myself I should do what scares me and let’s see what would be going on. I told my family I wouldn’t join them because of the work conditions so I chose to be home alone. They all were surprised and asked if I would be okay and of course, I re-confirmed. They agreed and it was when I had to go through what I chose… I was in my home without anyone, I was damn scared, I turned all the light on and I could not look into the mirror, I tried to escape them… Of course, I could not sleep tight as well… As thought, many imaginations did happen in my mind so I was trying hard to fight with them… It was my mind which created those imaginations so it must be me who had to control my own mind! I did all my house chores and I also found more tasks to do. I spent my time in a productivity way and I wanted time to move faster as well… Finally, it was 9.00 PM that I did all the things and it made me exhausted… Dinner was had while I just laid on the mattress, I was blackout… lol… Things didn’t just end, I waked up at 2.00 AM and I was quite shocked… “Why wasn’t it 6.00 AM”, I was muttering… However, I could manage it again, I told myself, this 2.00 AM was already morning while some people, they would get up and went straight to the wholesale market to buy vegetables for their day time selling… I told myself I was one of those lucky people who could continue my sleep… lol… Then, I won my own mind, even without my family, I could go on and life still goes on!

After a few days being home alone, I told my family I wanted to visit them in the province and they were just like…” Why didn’t I just go with them from the start?” hehehe… Actually, I wanna test myself! 

Leaving from home at around 6.00 AM, I was on TukTuk alone to the bus station, I was a bit clumsy to find where I could get the ticket but there were many kind people who could guess my situation and told me… I then headed to have breakfast that almost made me miss the bus! I ran to the bus and handed my ticket, I found my seat! Most of people looked at me, I may look so weird from looking around again and again… 

It was just a bus but I felt so excited to be there alone, without knowing anyone and of course, it was my first time of life as well to be on public bus! In addition, maybe I also looked strange… I was in the very short jeans, T-shirt and hood Adidas jacket while with my gray fluffy mini bag… Two and a half hours later, I arrived my destination…

Last but not least, I loved my this decision a lot! I could see myself better, I could own my mind and I could win over my imagination while I’m growing braver as well! That is such a good start! 

#lovemyself

A Strong Lady’s Hurtful Story

There is a warm and wealthy family who is living comfortably. There are four family members, the parents and two children. The mother is the business woman and the father is the professional employee of a private company. The mother could earn quite remarkably from her business and she never need any support from her husband to their family. She is wise and a strong lady. The father could earn nicely as well and since his wife never asks any cents from him, he just keeps his earning. The both children never meet any obstacles in life, they could get what they wish for but they both are well educated from their school and especially, their mother, stay humble and friendly.

One day, an unexpected tragic thing happens and damages the whole family’s happiness! The mother finds out the father has been betraying her and has the second wife. This is what she’s never ever imagined it could happen in her family. Thus, it is not a short period of relationship between them since they have a few kids already. The mother is speechless but stays calm and waiting for her husband explanation. She believes he would be back to her warm family and she is ready to forgive him as well.

However, things seem don’t go right. This is the second shock to the mother and the family! The father decides to divorce his perfect and understanding wife. His reason is very ridiculous. He claims that his second wife and his kids with her cannot live without him. He knows this clearly than anyone since his second family is depending on his earning to move on. He believes his first wife is the strong lady who could lead the family well even without him and so do his first both children with the first wife. They are strong from birth, thanks to his first wife.

The wife almost could not believe her ears! Yet, she lets him go. It doesn’t mean she has no romantic deeply feeling toward him but she accepts that his soul already left her family. Even if she is trying to take him back, all remaining is only his body…

The first wife looks total fine but actually she is broken inside and that takes years to heal her wounds. Her children as well, they all need time to heal their pain from this shocking occurring…

To me, I see the father as the selfish person, the most selfish one! I don’t think he decides to live with his second wife because they cannot live without him but because he wants to show his self-worth. He must think that he is just nothing in his first family but he is the real main leading person in his second family. To my opinion, he is just trying to please himself by using the second family as excuse! He wants recognition, he wants fame, he wants power and he wanna be the real king in the family.

And the first wife, the strong lady ends up being even stronger but a bit lonely without her beloved man… Yet, she could live and moves on because of her two children. They are her hope, her motivation to go on and the biggest precious gift from her marriage with the man she loves the most…

#fiction#bases#on#real#story#in#society

This and That about Snake Horoscope of 2018

1. Overall of Snake

Frankly, I’m still in a blurry spot of where I can go and who I want to be…

I’m still losing in a mysterious world of my life! Things I didn’t dare to get, I got offered and I rejected while I think I’m ready to get them, they stop coming to me! I’m seeking for the chance now…

Well, only one thing I am sure I want so much is my beauty! Hehehe… I started spending in order to get a white skin of both my face and body… While I wanna get the surgery of my nose and my body too… I wanna be a slim sexy lady… hehe… I would manage on my diet first and try for exercising or if they don’t work on me, I would try to save and go to further action! This is all of what I am so clear I want to do in this year! xD

2. Quick Facts about Snake

I love how they are describing “Quick facts about Snake”! Hehehe… I feel funny and of course, it is actually my personality…

3. Money & Career

This is the most accurate one to me, I got the new job and already moved in mid of June. I was promised to get incentive and even promotion. Yet, the incentive that he promised, it doesn’t happen yet and I couldn’t imagine about promotion then… lol

4. Family & Friends

I got these predictions from two different websites and well, I’m facing it now! Day by day, I get such painful argument with my Mom which made her crying sometime and made me quite hurt in tearing every time we are fighting... I could say I’m such a bad daughter to her but I cannot stop myself not to debate with her. She is too much to me lately which I find it hard to bare. Though, she is still my mother. I would try to calm myself and follow the advice from the prediction, stay calm, be kind and gentle. Last but not least, avoid disputes and quarrels with all and especially my female relatives.

Don't be a BOSS - be a LEADER

By: Brigette Hyacinth

Author: The Future of Leadership: Rise of Automation, Robotics and Artificial Intelligence 🔹 Keynote Speaker 🔹

I've worked for many bosses but few leaders. Working under a bad boss can make a good job even in the best company, unbearable. As the saying goes, people don't leave bad jobs, they leave bad bosses.

Here are the 4 types of bad bosses that make employees want to quit companies:

1) “Marionette” - In an age of uncertainty, many managers are yielding to this trap of just playing it safe to preserve their position and privileges. They just follow orders. They are mere puppets and exude no loyalty to employees. It's demotivating working for a manager who does not stand up for their team. If you make a mistake they quickly turn into judge, jury and executioner. It's hard to feel passion for a job when you experience this.

2) “King Kong” - Some bosses when they reach to the top immediately forget where they came from. These type of managers possess a superiority complex and like to draw the distinction between management and staff. It is dreadful to work under a manager who is more worried about pushing their weight around than building relationships. Great leaders don’t talk down to their employees. They treat everyone with respect.

3) “Superman” - They think the organization revolves around them. Some start behaving like they are the owners of the company. This trap includes making all of the decisions solo, ignoring feedback you don't like and taking the credit." Letting your ego get ahead of you and thinking you know it all is a sure path to failure. Showing some humility and vulnerability allows you to strengthen relations with your team.

4) “Taskmaster” - Their sole focus is on the bottom-line. They use the carrot and stick approach to motivation which clearly doesn't work. Continuously drilling employees is a sure way make them unhappy at work. Micromanagement suffocates, demoralizes and kills creativity. These managers get so caught up in the bottom line that they forget to treat people with dignity and respect. Very few bosses show empathy towards their team members and this helps improve overall morale and performance.

" An employee's motivation is a direct result of the sum of interactions with his or her manager." - Bob Nelson

Then there is the LEADER. A leader coaches, supports and inspires. He/she puts the interests of their team before their own. Leaders develop safe atmospheres where risk-taking and feedback is welcomed. They take care of their team. The focus is to help everyone around them succeed. They push their team to grow and become their very best. A leader never leaves any of his team members to hang out dry. When a leader is at the helm, employees feel valued and appreciated. The corporate world is littered with managers but lacks leaders. Employees long for managers who are leaders.

Lauralee emailed me this: "I worked for a company in Brussels a few years ago when my brother had cancer. In that year, I had 10 weeks leave visiting him and then, when he died, attending his funeral). When I asked my manager, Eric how I could repay the company for all these extra holidays, he simply replied "they weren't holidays, don't worry about it". To this day, Eric was the best manager I ever had... I would walk over hot coals for him!"

Bad bosses cost the world economy an estimated $360 billion in productivity.

Employee engagement is at an all-time low (32%). Usually when an employee has an issue with their company, it has to do with something regarding their manager. Companies need to take a closer look at their managers and their leadership style. Employee engagement is more of a manager issue. 75% of American workers say their boss is the worst and most stressful part of their jobs. How bad are they? Bad enough for 65% of respondents to say they’d rather have a new boss over a pay raise. Can a manager become a leader? Yes, it's possible. Sometimes it just takes being human and developing your people skills. Technical skills alone do not keep employees motivated. In this Artificial Intelligence economy, the new smart is not determined by IQ but by EQ. It's about listening, relating, collaborating and connecting with your team. This takes humility, authenticity and empathy.

Studies have shown that leading with vision, inspiration, and purpose, produces better bottom-line results as well as happier, more engaged employees. If we want employees to feel commitment to the organization; we need to show we respect and value them. The "human touch" makes all the difference. If you want to make a lasting positive impact - Don't be a boss, be a leader!

Resource: https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/dont-boss-leader-brigette-hyacinth/

A Pound of Butter (Honesty)

There was a farmer who sold a pound of butter to a baker. One day the baker decided to weigh the butter to see if he was getting the right amount, which he wasn’t. Angry about this, he took the farmer to court.

The judge asked the farmer if he was using any measure to weight the butter. The farmer replied,

“Honor, I am primitive. I don’t have a proper measure, but I do have a scale.”

The judge asked, “Then how do you weigh the butter?”

The farmer replied;

“Your Honor, long before the baker started buying butter from me, I have been buying a pound loaf of bread from him. Every day when the baker brings the bread, I put it on the scale and give him the same weight in butter. If anyone is to be blamed, it is the baker.”

Moral of the story: In life, you get what you give. Don’t try and cheat others.

The Group of Frogs (Encouragement)

As a group of frogs was traveling through the woods, two of them fell into a deep pit. When the other frogs crowded around the pit and saw how deep it was, they told the two frogs that there was no hope left for them.

However, the two frogs decided to ignore what the others were saying and they proceeded to try and jump out of the pit. Despite their efforts, the group of frogs at the top of the pit were still saying that they should just give up. That they would never make it out.

Eventually, one of the frogs took heed to what the others were saying and he gave up, falling down to his death. The other frog continued to jump as hard as he could. Again, the crowd of frogs yelled at him to stop the pain and just die.

He jumped even harder and finally made it out. When he got out, the other frogs said, “Did you not hear us?”

The frog explained to them that he was deaf. He thought they were encouraging him the entire time.

Moral of the story: People’s words can have a big effect on other’s lives. Think about what you say before it comes out of your mouth. It might just be the difference between life and death.

Thinking Out of the Box (Creative Thinking)

In a small Italian town, hundreds of years ago, a small business owner owed a large sum of money to a loan-shark. The loan-shark was a very old, unattractive looking guy that just so happened to fancy the business owner’s daughter.

He decided to offer the businessman a deal that would completely wipe out the debt he owed him. However, the catch was that we would only wipe out the debt if he could marry the businessman’s daughter. Needless to say, this proposal was met with a look of disgust.

The loan-shark said that he would place two pebbles into a bag, one white and one black.

The daughter would then have to reach into the bag and pick out a pebble. If it was black, the debt would be wiped, but the loan-shark would then marry her. If it was white, the debt would also be wiped, but the daughter wouldn’t have to marry the loan-shark.

Standing on a pebble-strewn path in the businessman’s garden, the loan-shark bent over and picked up two pebbles. Whilst he was picking them up, the daughter noticed that he’d picked up two black pebbles and placed them both into the bag.

He then asked the daughter to reach into the bag and pick one.

The daughter naturally had three choices as to what she could have done:

1. Refuse to pick a pebble from the bag.

2. Take both pebbles out of the bag and expose the loan-shark for cheating.

3. Pick a pebble from the bag fully well knowing it was black and sacrifice herself for her father’s freedom.

She drew out a pebble from the bag, and before looking at it ‘accidentally’ dropped it into the midst of the other pebbles. She said to the loan-shark;

“Oh, how clumsy of me. Never mind, if you look into the bag for the one that is left, you will be able to tell which pebble I picked.”

The pebble left in the bag is obviously black, and seeing as the loan-shark didn’t want to be exposed, he had to play along as if the pebble the daughter dropped was white, and clear her father’s debt.

Moral of the story: It’s always possible to overcome a tough situation throughout of the box thinking, and not give in to the only options you think you have to pick from.

The Right Place

A mother and a baby camel were lying around under a tree.

Then the baby camel asked, “Why do camels have humps?”

The mother camel considered this and said, “We are desert animals so we have the humps to store water so we can survive with very little water.”

The baby camel thought for a moment then said, “Ok…why are our legs long and our feet rounded?”

The mama replied, “They are meant for walking in the desert.”

The baby paused. After a beat, the camel asked, “Why are our eyelashes long? Sometimes they get in my way.”

The mama responded, “Those long thick eyelashes protect your eyes from the desert sand when it blows in the wind.

The baby thought and thought. Then he said, “I see. So the hump is to store water when we are in the desert, the legs are for walking through the desert and these eye lashes protect my eyes from the desert then why in the Zoo?”

The Lesson: Skills and abilities are only useful if you are in the right place at the right time. Otherwise they go to waste.