RellaDeQueen: We will always be the one we commit to be!

Yesterday, I was talking with Mom about this and that. We were smiling, laughing and suddenly Mom noticed something and asked me surprisingly... Mom: Huh!!! You had dimple on your right cheek??!!! Me: Hah?? You didn't know Mom? Mom: Uhmmm.... (she's speechless) Me: nahh Mom, you raised me up for over twenty years and you didn't know? Mom: Ohhhh? Me: hahahahaa.... highfive Mom!!! For over twenty years, I just knew I had dimple these few weeks too! XD Mom: hehehe, that's why your second son also had dimple... Me: But I should have dimple since I was kid, right? Or because I was fat that cannot see it, wasn't I? Mom: Make sense...you were fat and now still be called fat... XD... Then, it was exactly dimple or you just get wrinkle skin for losing those small weight? Hahahaha Me: Ewwww....unreasonable!!!! =,= (Welllllll....Mom always teases me...) Mom is correct, I won't lose so much weight... Just a few kilograms and I never noticed I had dimple on m...

I’m feeling like in the isolated world because I’m so lonely. Only if I can have just one friend at work, I won’t feel this way. However, there is none. I’m not greedy for overwhelmed friendship, just be someone who consider me as their real friend is enough. I love to be friends with people around me but they always ignore me…. I always ask myself almost every minutes of why they are doing this to me. I used to believe that there must be any error or painful scar between us. Though, it doesn’t seem this way. They just don’t wanna me to be part of their world. This causes me to be so sick with my mental health. Their entertainment time rarely has my presence and it is not from I dislike to join. However, today I find out that the resource to make me feel so stuck, so lonely, so isolated is most of part causing from myself. Maybe I already liked them… Maybe I feel envious to their strong relationship. Or, maybe I’m not comfortable to see their no attention on me… BUT: Why do I ...

From birth till secondary school, I was just a silent and gentle girl but I was convinced that it’s nothing happy for being this way. So after I joined high school, I nurtured myself and found new me of a talkative person. I did have many friends and enjoyed high school moments. I loved it a lot. I continued to talk a lot and did love sharing. In my early university class, I was brave enough to stand up, ask questions or answering even the lecturer didn’t point to me. However, later I was selected to do the presentation in front of hundreds students which at that time I could remember none words to present my topic. Feeling so ashamed, nervous, complicated.... Confident left my world.... What has happened in my early university made me concern. During my first and second job, I was the staff who just did the job as ordered from management. I didn’t tend to show any of my views even I believed it won’t work out…. This habit dragged me to be the coward and I was treated very low...

In a professional working suit with some documents in our hands, I and my team are going to audit our staff’s accommodation. We don’t inform them in advance at all since we want to see the exact situation and the way they are living; plus, if they take a good care of their place or not. That’s also how we find out if we should add/change any home equipment more for them or if there is somewhere to repair, etc. It’s around 10AM now, from room to room, we mark the points and take notes. Some is just more than messy and bad smell too; while some is very neat! (Even better than my personal room at home XD) We almost have done our job, only one more room to check. When we walk in that last room, we hear the showering sound… ehhh, how come it is possible, they should just leave for work already, or they forget to turn it off? I am about to open that bathroom’s door; simultaneously, it opens itself… A so tall white guy comes out; I bet he is at least 1.82m! And he is naked….the half up...

I am feeling so awful, so I’m sobbing, He sees it and asks about what’s happening, I tell him the real thing, He seems mad for me but try to please me up. He embraces me and says it’s enough, Stop being sad, let’s be satisfied, Don’t cry, things won’t always be that bad, Don’t be sad coz now he is by my side. He wipes the tears on my eyes, He softly put my falling hair to be tidy, He kisses my eyes, my forehead and promises me, He gonna make thing to be better. While we are hugging each other, I frankly feel in much pleasure, Coz of his chocolate caring makes me wonder, Of how to pause the time not to go further… However, I find out something weird, He seems in high attention while other make me hurt, But he often inserts me into millions reasons for crying, Then why does he always pretend as nothing occurring??? Well, because of my overboard thinking, I can’t really enjoy the moment of well treat as the queen, From my real and t...

It started with my dream again… I dreamt of singing with a cool man I did love… There were audiences around us and I felt I knew a few of them, looked like my colleagues… We sang and we danced, we danced quite much until our clothes ripped off our body that remained only our underwear. I was shy and tried to cover my body with my own hug and moved into the bathroom but accidently slipped into the bathroom pool. It was the highest floor of the building but that bathroom pool seemed have something witchy that when I fell into it, it continued to slip my body down quite quick to fall into another pool… I tried to stand up from the water and found myself locating in the bathroom again; though it was the lowest floor of the building!!!” A new day came after dream… After I got up from that dream, I tried to analyze the meaning of it. People may find it ridiculous for paying much attention on dream. However, my dream mostly has its core meaning for what is about to happen in my r...

How to do? :< It have been times that I think I wanna leave you, And when I think of leaving you, There always have other that call me to be theirs, They lay their arms waiting to embrace me! They tell me they will be kind to me, They will treat me the way I always wish to be, They will treasure me as the diamond, And that was once the first time I decided to leave you. However, leaving you kinda almost block my breath, I can’t feel I can live at ease, Only a few days passed, I insist the new to back to you, Then, we are together again. The seasons keep changing, Just like the ways you treat me keep changing too, My feeling is swaying and swaying, That I restart to think the same thought of leaving you. Maybe I’m a bit proud, Coz during these years we are together, Other keep flirting me and calling me to be theirs, Just I don’t really dare to make it happen. Although, because of your changes, I second time blindly go to meet ...

Last week, my guy persuaded me to go for River Festival in Kompong Cham Province (KPC) and I thought it gonna be nothing great, so I rejected. However, we still have been there after I lost the debate with him...lol.. I really felt blank for this trip while my hubby cannot fall asleep a day before the departure, he would be damn excited...hehehe... Well, even I thought it would be just so so for the festival but I still love the idea of driving to the province and enjoy nature along the both sides of the road. We started to leave Phnom Penh on Friday last week at 6.30 AM and we reached Skun District at 8:30 AM for breakfast. u knw? uhmm, m sure u don knw...lol..no tea at all! #good#at#acting XD look at their faces!! wat if other thought they were kidnapped? xD   #duplicate#his#mom I meant face! not dat doggy tongue! lol We arrived KPC at 9.30 AM. We were walking around the market and brought a few drink bags of coffee and lime tea... Until the evening, m...